Even In Blackouts present The Larry and Raul Show!

Liz C (flatmate) and I went to the Even In Blackouts gig last night at Simon's Tavern on N. Clark, a dingy but nice wee bar with regular live music. Even In Blackouts were great as always, despite being a little unrehearsed. Luckily they have enough talent and charisma to pull it off and nobody minded them forgetting words, coming in at the wrong time or not knowing which song to play next. They also made me feel really welcome, asking after my family, chatting away about time spent here and in Glasgow and letting me steal hats. N.B. Liz E (EIB) has promised to come shopping next time and I'm determined to hold her to it.


Entertainment was also supplied by The Larry and Raul Show. Two men in their 60s who came and sat next to Liz C and I because we were in 'their' seats. We were about to make our excuses and find another table but they were harmless and so funny so we stayed. Things started off well enough, a polite enquiry about the band, did we mind them joining us but this was their usual spot, nice weather we're having and then... the question that opened up a whole can of worms:

Raul, "Where are you from?"
Me, "Scotland"
R and Larry, "Oh wow, she's from Scotland, hey did you hear that? This girl's from Scotland. All the way over there in Europe. Scotland, huh? Wow"
Me, "Yeah, Scotland, it's nice"

I then spent the rest of my evening answering a barrage of questions and trying to answer them truthfully whilst not being sure if they're winding me up or not. I came to the conclusion that they weren't winding me up and they really didn't know anything about the world outside America. Questions included:

What language do they speak in Scotland?
Do they speak Garlic like the Irish? (Gaelic)
Do you have Mexican food in Scotland?
Do you have Spanish food in Scotland, cos that's different ya know?
Is it all mountains in Scotland?
Do you have freeways in Scotland?
Do you have Chinese food in Scotland?
Do you have Italians in Scotland?
Do you have Poles in Scotland? (I assume they meant the people not upright cylinders but you never know)
How do you say love in Scotch? (they very quickly were told off for saying Scotch)
How do you say cheers in Scottish?
Where exactly is Scotland?
Oh, it's part of England is it? (I nearly stopped talking to them at this point but Raul saved the day when he told Larry it wasn't)
Do they have Indian food in Scotland?
Do they have McDonald's in Scotland? (Even Baghdad has McDonalds. This was lost on them as they didn't know where Baghdad was either)
Do they have Burger King in Scotland?
Do they have Wendy's in Scotland? (No. Oh that's a shame, they don't have Wendy's in Scotland, they don't have them. Tsk tsk)
Do they have their own money in Scotland? (On payday we do!)
What's the food like in Scotland?
Is Scotland where 'haggish' is from? (He meant haggis)
Why do you have to have a big bag on the bagpipes? (Erm, cos without the bag they'd just be pipes)
What's the capital city of Scotland? (Larry then tried to correct MY pronunciation of Edinboro!)
They really have Mexican food in Scotland?

I would have mentioned the fact that we only just got electricity and running water but I thought my sarcasm would have been lost on them so it was better sticking to the facts. Liz C, Phil and Gub were really embarrassed about them, thinking that I would think all Americans are as thick as Larry and Raul but it was fine because I know that it's only the majority who are as thick as them and at least they were asking questions.

I should also mention that every question started with "Hey, Scotland"!