How did this happen?

There are a few 'how did this happens?' that I'm thinking about, firstly I covet a sofa, secondly I'm framing 'art' and thirdly I almost lost contact with someone completely accidentally.

To begin, Alasdair and I bought a mattress on Friday which was long overdue as his current mattress is an orthopaedics dream come true; lumpy, bumpy and uneven. Nightmare. Even I was struggling to sleep sometimes! So we headed down to Argos and pulled my favourite trick of buying something of decent quality in the sale. All the quality half the price. Fantastic.

After that, and a quick trip to his mum's to deliver a birthday bouquet, it was off to Ikea to buy some picture frames. Only it wasn't just picture frames that caught our eye... we now covet a dark brown leather sofa and pouffe and have started saving up accordingly.

Beyond the sofa desire, I'm shocked that I'm not only framing postcards and calling it art but I'm also framing the paper bags they come in and calling them art too. It's not as bad as you think though, they actually look good together, honest.

Finally, I'm a bit annoyed at googlemail. My friend Isla left Glasgow 18 months ago to live in Sydney before going travelling for a few months. We promised we'd stay in touch and we did. But googlemail had other ideas. Any time I emailed her she'd reply with her news and everytime she replied I had no idea. I still have no idea where her emails have gone, maybe I'll get them when I'm old and wrinkly but for now they seem to have disappeared into cyberspace.

Thankfully we met up at their party on Saturday evening and managed to sort our communication problems out. Formal congrats to Zain and Isla and Matt and KP who were all announcing their engagements at the weekend.

We also managed to catch Dean Queasy and David Bowie gigging on Sunday night. Dean Queasy are a great wee band with fantastic lyrics courtesy of Simon Richardson and David Bowie was in the guise of Tigers on Vaseline, an amazing Bowie tribute band. They played all the old Ziggy Stardust hits and with the exception of one particularly difficult note, the singer was spot on. Can't wait to see them again.

Flash! Bang! Whatta picture...

I've just uploaded a whole load of photos from the DISI party at the end of March and Club Noir at the start of June to my flickr page. Go and have a gander and a giggle.

Also, the first showing of 'As the sparks fly upwards...' went really well. It wasn't a huge turnout but the feedback was invaluable and I can't wait till September to do it for real.

Dissertations, Decorating and Dancing

It's all go at uni at the moment with the first draft of our dissertation in and awaiting feedback before the final is due mid July. It is driving me slightly mad at the moment because my academic writing has never been a strong point. Granted, I do always manage to pull it out the bag but it doesn't really come naturally to me so I need to get my head down and get stuck into it.

As always, the practical side of the work is rolling out no problem so I suppose I should be pleased about that. If you want an idea of what I'm producing have a look at Confessions of a Screendance Student. The work will be on display in Dundee this September as well as (hopefully) being programmed at The Arches at some point this winter as well.

Alasdair's been busy too re-decorating his flat. His flat isn't in the best area but it's a good flat with 2 bedrooms and a front and back garden which is great during the summer. Even better now he's got rid of the dodgy 80s decor that's been there since he moved in.

Finally, Lisa, Alasdair and I went to Club Noir this month for some old-fashioned, dressed up dancing. I'd been told that it was full of fag hags in their underwear so, of course, I went wearing my sparkly pants on the look out for new gay best friends to dance with. I wasn't disappointed. Lee, Lewis and Ricky certainly fit the bill and even came prepared with a feather for my sparkly headband - it was meant to be!

Guess my Age

Ok, so you lot probably know what age I am but there's a website where complete strangers look at a picture of you and in a click of the mouse can flatter you immeasurably or shatter any self-confidence you dared to have. It's quite fun flicking through other people's pics and guessing their ages, although be kind because they are the same people who will be guessing your age!

Have a look... The Age Project

Amsterdam Part Deux

Our second trip to Amsterdam in the last six months was even better than the first. As well as being my first time there during the summer it was also my friends, Yasmin and Adam's, joint Hen and Stag do, or 'HAG do' as I like to call it.

The hotel was a huge improvement on the last one simply because there was room to move around without having to climb on the bed or wait til the other person passes. It could have done without the clogs or coos on the walls though!



We spent most of our time watching the world go by, giggling like schoolgirls, drinking freshly squeezed orange juice and wandering around the canals feeling jealous of anyone in a boat.

Saturday night was spent at Club 11, a bar/club/restaurant situated on the 11th floor of a dis-used postal building, which you have to enter by a lift complete with grafitti and ghetto blaster. I think it's the only club I've been to with windows (the only one I remember anyway) which meant we had great nights views across the city and an extremely early glimmer of sunrise towards the end of the night. Gorgeous.



Sunday was supposed to be sports day for the Hag do but the blistering heat combined with varying degrees of hangovers put paid to that. Instead we decided to laugh at Yas in her Hen gear and 'interesting' articles in the Candian Cosmo (apparently women are worse drivers than men because they are 'foolish' and 'apply make up'!!!) and just generally laze about... Can anyone spot a theme here?

All in all it was a relaxing weekend which is lucky because I have a presentation in front of the examination board on Monday for uni and need to have my wits about me.

Think I'm Turning Japanese...

After the untimely demise of my last car I needed a new one, fast. So it was off round the car showrooms on Saturday weighing up the pros and cons of different cars and I ended up with a shiny silver Honda Civic that has less miles per year than my old car, is a diesel (essential for the amount of miles I do), has a huge boot, spacious interior and 5 doors and is costing less than my old monthly payments.

All in all I was quite chuffed so decided to celebrate on Sunday evening by going to Ichiban - Japanese car = Japanese food, obviously. I'd been told it was the same deal as Wagamama but better and they weren't wrong. We shared a sushi platter and salmon teriyaki, each had a chilli chicken ramen and a couple of drinks all for less than £40 plus the sushi platter was £12 which you wouldn't necessarily have each time so it turns into a bargain night out. Plus Alasdair lost his chopstick virginity and it has to be said he did really well - everything in his mouth and nothing on his lap!

Anyway we're leaving Japan (and Scotland) and heading to The Netherlands this weekend. Forecast for Amsterdam is 20-22 degrees all weekend so I'll be spending today frantically de-fuzzing and fake-tanning the legs so I can wear an array of summer dresses and feel all sunny.

Lovely.

Condorrat Killed my Car!

On Monday 21st April at approximately 1.25pm the engine on my car chucked it just as I was driving over the brow of the hill. Luckily the big scary looking lorry on my inside realised that I wasn't just some dafty who had decided to change lanes and that I needed to pull over. Fast.

After over an hour at the roadside recovery centre with numerous mechanics trying to get it started again I decided just to take it back to the garage that had been working on it at the start of April. On Thursday they agreed that it had actually died but are looking into the possibility of a reconditioned engine for it.

All in all it's not looking good for my wee car but I have had more than my fair share of miles out of it so I can't complain (too much!). Any suggestions for what happens now will be greatly appreciated. Other than the engine the car is in really good condition so it's a bit of a pain that this has happened.

The Fate of the Hindenshug

Technical failings were blamed today ahead of the launch of Nitshill's first indoor airship. The Goodyear Radio Controlled Indoor blimp suffered a small tear during inflation and subsequently failed to get off the ground. Aeronautical engineer, Mr Sutherland is thought to be 'gutted' at the malfunction and blames shoddy workmanship at the source of it. His partner, Miss McGarvey, who financed the zepellin, agrees with this diagnosis and can't believe she was duped into parting with cash for this ill-fated project.

Another Year and What Have I Done?

In my 27th year I have gone back to uni, gone on holidays to America, Amsterdam, Canada and the Isle of Wight, performed in Chicago, had a film screened in Johannesberg, been in hospital, made my way down the housing association list (grr), managed to put 2 cars off the road at the same time, stayed up very late on more than one occasion, rediscovered my fringe and my waist, tried (and liked) brown sauce, met Slash, suffered with slash and burn, grudgingly thanked the Findhorn fairies, got to grips with html and css, freaked myself out with sleep paralysis, drove down the 101 with the top down, caught a fish and ate it for dinner and had my root chakra fondled by a pensioner.

Wonder what 28 will bring?

On the Upside...

Blaze @ Bacchus was brilliant. The dancers were amazing, so much more relaxed than usual, and the DJs were great with a full dancefloor for most of the night. I think the party/performance combo is definitely the way forward for Blaze but a bigger venue will be needed for the next one...

Suggestions on a postcard please.

Enough to Drive Anyone Mad

Every now and then something, or rather some things, happen which are sent to try you. These things are usually out of your control, extremely irritating and costly. In the past few weeks it's been car trouble all round at our house. Starting with my car and the suspicious engine grumbles quickly followed by warning lights and lots of stalling. Turns out my engine has been consuming oil like it's about to go out of fashion which has resulted in parts of the engine burning out and having to be replaced, I'm sure you can feel my pain.

While my car was off the road, my parents very kindly offered me the use of their lovely (very expensive) motor to make my life easier trying to get heavy equipment to and from Dundee. To repay them I decided to replace the petrol I'd used before they asked.

Big mistake.

Instead of replacing half a tank of petrol I should have replaced half a tank of diesel!

Make that 2 cars off the road. To add insult to injury we had to be towed home by the second roadside recovery man who came out to us (although the first one was the voice of doom so I was quite glad to see the back of him - lot's of sucking in air and quotes of £4000-5000! not very helpful at all).

Thankfully the voice of doom was precisely that and the car was drained, cleaned and back on the road within a day. My car took slightly longer, however. Seven days in total and a hefty bill at the end of it just for fun. Add that to my public transport bill for the last week and it's been an expensive week all round.

DISI Rascals

At the beginning of 2005 I was involved in a pilot programme for YDance's Dance In Schools Initiative. The plan was that throughout the course of 3 years, 12 full time dancers would deliver dance to every local authority in Scotland which basically involved lots of early mornings (it has been known for tutors to leave at 4am!), lots of staff rooms and lots of carry on.

As the project has now come to an end, and 12 dancers are now looking for work, YDance decided to soften the blow by throwing a party for everyone involved.

I can't remember laughing so much in all my life. A room full of dancers, some of whom don't see one another from one year to the next, all having too much to drink and dancing like lunatics. At the start of the night everyone was on their best behaviour and looking amazing - we're an attractive bunch, you know - and by the end of it I was being lifted by Dan, the skinniest man in the world, being told I was the coolest person ever by Dan and my new GBF, Allan, (and people wonder why I'm such a fag hag) and dancing like a dafty to Windowlicker. Sarah almost had a fit when Wallace put that track on and ordered him to play it in full or risk getting all his records scratched.

The night ended with me, Sarah and Alasdair continuing the party back at his flat, much to the amusement of his (sober) flatmate who decided he might as well just get up and join us.

Me and Allan strike a pose!

Colour Lover

Ok, so you may not be able to tell from my rather minimal blog but I love colourful things. I wear lots of colours and have lots of nice bright things (usually worn with shades of grey but I'm happy leaving the full on technicolour to Blue Peter presenters). Anyway, I've just stumbled upon a site specifically for Colour Lovers... called, wait for it ColourLovers.com

You can browse colours, palettes and patterns, spot trends and if you're brave enough, even submit your own colourful creations. I haven't got round to that yet but I have found inspiration for a website I'm designing for Annie and am now on the hunt for more.

Comedians, Coincidences and Copping Off

The weekend started with a trip to Oban for work before driving to Ardrishaig near Lochgilphead for an overnight stay ready for more work on Saturday morning. Lisa and I had been to the same place the previous week and had caused chaos chatting to the locals and managing to offend one man by asking if he had paid for this new wife from Thailand. With that in mind we were quite glad that there was a comedy night planned, entertainment and something to distract the locals from our big gobs.

The comedians were really good actually with only one exception - a local woman who thought a parody of Flower of Scotland would be a good idea, hmm. Wouldn't have been so bad if it was any good but it was rank rotten. Anyway, the rest of them were really good, particularly a duet who did a whole set of improvised sketches based on audience suggestions. The whole thing reminded me of the Neo-Futurists show I saw in Chicago and when I mentioned this to one of the comedians he told me I was spot on. Not only that but he went to see the Neo-Futurists a few years ago and was only disappointed by the fact that John Jughead Pierson, the man whose music introduced him to Neo-Futurists in the first place, wasn't there. He was on tour. In Glasgow. At a gig my brother organised and I designed flyers for.

Very small world.

And now onto the 'Copping Off' part of the blog. Perhaps a bit of a misleading title as it's probably a lesson in how not to cop off. To the young man from Bothwell in the Sub Club on Saturday night... when trying to charm a young lady with the intention of a kiss and a cuddle at the end of the night, it's probably an idea to establish whether or not she has a boyfriend before kissing her hand and maybe try to learn her name as well and, most importantly, the line 'if worst comes to worst I've got a hotel room booked, hen' is highly unlikely to result in anything more than a slap on the face.

Funniest thing was, about half an hour after I managed to shake him off I walked past him hassling some other girl and overheard him shouting 'HOTEL ROOM' at her face.

Smooth!

Burning and Burning

What a week it's been. In uni I've been busy editing the multi-camera shoot for Scottish Dance Theatre's latest piece DOG which is actually a lot of fun. In one viewer you have the choice of footage from the four different cameras and in the other you see your current selection. It's very tactile and very similar to choreography in that you pick the best view of each section to show the audience. Anyway, it's all good fun but not when you only have two days to learn it, do it and get it onto DVD for Scottish Dance Theatre to show to a festival in Athens. And even less fun when you're left to your own devices to do it. To say I was feeling a little un-supported is putting it mildly. Anyway thanks to Derrick's Linton and Blackie and a marathon DVD burning session today it's all done and they better like it!

Back to my own stuff next week learning Isadora. Woo hoo!

Other burning news. My pee is on fire again. Not funny at all. Back to the doc's tomorrow to get it sorted. I'm getting really fed up with it now, it seems like every few months I have cystitis. It used to go away after a few hours and a dose of Cystopurin but not it lasts at least a week and medicine only takes the sting out of it slightly.

After that pleasant news... I also finished a new film this week (yes, that's how busy I've been!). These Things Happen was filmed at Angus Balbernie's creative lab a few weeks ago and at first I was struggling with all the footage of very different improvisations and trying to figure out how to put them all together but I had a lightbulb moment at the start of the week and decided to do the minimum amount of editing. The footage I decided to work with was filmed on my mobile and the only thing I did to it was to rotate some of the scenes that were filmed in portrait so the film feels like it's rotating but the dancers stay standing. It's going to be screened at The Dance House's Re:Surface event next Wednesday evening. If you'd like to come along, get in touch and I'll send you an invite.

That's all for now.